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![\"\"](\"https:\/\/feedingandrew.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/07\/zucchini-blossoms-41.jpg\" "\\"zucchini")
<\/a><\/dt>\n- Stuffed Squash Blossoms with Three Cheeses<\/dd>\n<\/dl>\n<\/div>\n
It was three years ago on the Fourth of July and we had just arrived at Cedar City, Utah for the Shakespeare festival.\u00a0 Each summer we meet a few other families to share four days immersed in the English language\u2019s highest literary accomplishments and some of the culinary world\u2019s biggest atrocities.\u00a0 Somehow, this remote Utah town had spectacularly latched onto the Bard, but little else from the civilized world.\u00a0 We were the first to arrive this particular summer and that\u2019s how we found ourselves sitting at the new Chile\u2019s Restaurant contemplating the first of many deep-fried meals.<\/p>\n
Andrew was also contemplating some other possibilities that weren\u2019t on the menu.<\/p>\n
One of our Shakespeare Friends had just recently flown to Canada to legally marry his partner.\u00a0 They shared four children from a previous marriage and would soon be arriving.\u00a0 The idea of \u201cgays\u201d was on Andrew\u2019s mind and he started asking questions.<\/p>\n
\u201cSo, I guess Frank was the first gay person I knew?\u201d he started.<\/p>\n
\u201cNo, Drew was the first.\u201d I responded, remembering how Drew had been there early on with baseball gloves, bats, and balls.<\/p>\n
\u201cDrew\u2019s gay?\u201d he shot out, almost choking on his popcorn shrimp.<\/p>\n
Drew is one of the most masculine, sports oriented guys I know and I could see how he didn\u2019t fit a stereotype for Andrew. \u00a0I responded calmly though, \u201cYah, you knew that.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cNo, I didn\u2019t.\u00a0 You NEVER told me that Drew was gay.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cWell, he is\u2026\u201d I trailed off, wondering where he was going with this.<\/p>\n
\u201cMan, you sure know a lot of gay people.\u201d He concluded.<\/p>\n
From Andrew\u2019s point of view, I did know a lot of gay people, but the truth was that most of my friends were parent with kids.\u00a0\u00a0 Still, these conversations about gay people occasionally surfaced and they created an opening for me to address the issue without it getting too personal.\u00a0 I told him that when you live in a city, you are bound to know more gay people than if you lived somewhere else.\u00a0 I explained how most gay people in smaller towns are rejected from their churches and communities and that many are even rejected by their families.<\/p>\n
\u201cBig cities\u201d I explained, \u201care typically much more forgiving of differences and so you will always find more gay people who have moved there to be around people who will accept them for who they are.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cWell, are you gay?\u201d he asked me, while nonchalantly stabbing at his plate.<\/p>\n
An alarm was suddenly ringing in my ears.<\/p>\n
Most dads don\u2019t have to come out to their children.\u00a0 I know there are a few who slip into marriages only to realize they have made a mistake, but the vast majority of men become dads exactly because they aren\u2019t gay!\u00a0 Yet here I was with my heart pounding and sweat starting to form on my forehead trying to decide what my next move would be.<\/p>\n
There were many reasons why I kept this from him in the beginning.\u00a0 The most obvious was my rational fear that his Uncles, whom had decidedly rejected the idea of taking him in, would somehow find it in their hearts to provide him a place under a stairwell somewhere or back in the closet he had slept in after his mother\u2019s death.\u00a0 Less rational, but even more frightening was my fear that if Andrew knew I was gay he would not want me to be his father.<\/p>\n
And now, two years later, the moment that I had been waiting for and dreading had finally come. \u00a0I had always imagined that it would be me bringing it up, but I had also made a promise to myself that if he did ask that I would never lie to him.<\/p>\n
Now, here I was, ready to come out to my son on Independence Day and in the State where I had lived the four most closeted years of my life.<\/p>\n
I looked straight at him and said, \u201cYes, Andrew.\u00a0 I am.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cNo, seriously Dad, are you gay?\u201d came the unexpected answer.<\/p>\n
\u201cAndrew, I\u2019m serious.\u00a0 I\u2019m gay.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cNO, SEEERIOUSLY, are YOU gay?\u201d<\/p>\n
I wasn\u2019t sure how many times I was going to have to tell him, but obviously I wasn\u2019t giving him the answer he had hoped for.\u00a0 I looked right at him, lowered my voice, and very calmly said, \u201cAndrew, I\u2019m being very serious.\u00a0 I\u2019m not joking and I promise I wouldn\u2019t lie about this.\u00a0 I am gay.\u201d<\/p>\n
It finally sunk in.\u00a0 Andrew became very quiet.\u00a0 He couldn\u2019t look at me and his fork was only moving food from one part of the plate to another.\u00a0 There were people all around us, the waiter refilled water and asked if we needed anything.\u00a0 Music continued to play.\u00a0 Yet, it was as if a bomb had gone off, leaving us momentarily deaf.\u00a0 We could see life all around us, but nothing penetrated through the aftermath of this revelation.\u00a0 Andrew\u2019s world was suddenly turned upside down again.\u00a0 The childish fantasies of his mom returning to share his good fortune were gone.\u00a0 The vision of who he imagined his dad to be vanished in just the space of a few words.\u00a0 The not unrealistic hope that I would marry and give him a mother\u2019s love once again was suddenly taken from him, leaving him bereft of hope and empty.\u00a0 He stared at his plate and we sat in a world devoid of sound and sensation.<\/p>\n
Finally, I asked him if he was all right.\u00a0 The sound of my voice shattered the silence and the world returned to normal, but forever changed.\u00a0 He said he was fine and he tried to eat, but couldn\u2019t actually get the fork to his mouth.\u00a0 A tear started to run down his cheek and he said he needed to go to the restroom.\u00a0 He was away for so long that I started to panic.\u00a0 I wanted to run to him and help him, but knew he needed some space.\u00a0 Just when I was about ready to go get him, he came out.\u00a0 He was solemn, but composed.\u00a0 Food was now out of the question and I paid the bill and we quickly left.<\/p>\n
I told him that he could ask me anything he wanted and I asked him a couple of questions that I can\u2019t even remember now.\u00a0 The one thing I do remember asking is \u201cDid you have any idea that I was gay?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cNo, not at all.\u201d Came his soft reply.<\/p>\n
Later that night, we got together with my friend Kenny and his daughter Sawyer.\u201d\u00a0 I had told Kenny about our evening and was grateful that he was there.\u00a0 I thought it would be good for Andrew to see how another kid lives with a gay dad.\u00a0 We bought some fireworks and found our own little corner of a school parking lot to celebrate the Fourth of July.\u00a0 We shot off semi-legal rockets, danced with sparklers, and lay back on the grass to contemplate the starry Utah summer sky.\u00a0 Andrew seemed to have recovered from the initial shock and his normal talkative self had returned.\u00a0 I still wasn\u2019t sure how long it would take for him to adjust to the idea of having a gay dad, but was relieved to see that life would continue.<\/p>\n
Later that night back at the hotel, as Andrew brushed his teeth and got ready for bed, I sat on the end of the my bed contemplating what the future would hold for us.<\/p>\n
Andrew suddenly stopped what he was doing and called out, \u201cDad.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cYes, Andrew?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cYou know what?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cNo, Andrew. What?\u201d<\/p>\n
He paused and looked into the mirror so he could make sure I was looking at him.\u00a0 He looked away and said, \u201cIt doesn\u2019t matter if you are Latino, African American, or Gay.\u00a0 You deserve to be called dad.\u201d<\/p>\n
Now it was my turn to hold back the tears.\u00a0 There are times when words just don\u2019t work, but I managed to say, \u201cThank you, Andrew\u201d as I walked over and gave him a hug.<\/p>\n
Andrew was only eleven at the time, but had somehow looked at the world around him and come up with his own conclusions.\u00a0 I remember thinking, \u201cwho is this kid that can be so out of control one moment and then floor me the next with insights beyond his age?\u201d\u00a0 But these words keep haunting me \u201cI have a dream that one day \u201cour children\u201d will not be judged by the color of their skin, but by the content of their character.\u201d\u00a0 Suddenly, I knew who this kid was.\u00a0 I know who this kid is.\u00a0 He is our future and I\u2019m forever indebted to him.<\/p>\n
Free at last!\u00a0 Free at last! Thank God Almighty, I am free at last.<\/p>\n
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STUFFED SQUASH BLOSSOMS WITH THREE CHEESES<\/strong><\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
\n\t![\"\"](\"https:\/\/feedingandrew.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/07\/zucchinni-fried-and-stuffed1.jpg\" "\\"zucchinni")
<\/a>\n\tLittle Pockets of OMG!<\/p>\n<\/div>\n
Every summer as the squash start to send out their vines in a race to dominate as much coveted garden real estate as possible, the promise of more zucchini than is humanly possible to eat emerges in a flowery display of sexy, Georgia O\u2019keefe like blossoms.\u00a0\u00a0 If you have a garden, now is the time to let that zucchini know who\u2019s the alpha gardener in this relationship and harvest enough blossoms for tonight\u2019s appetizer or dinner. For those sans garden, you need to hit your local farmers market early before the heat of the day starts to close the blossoms up.<\/p>\n
Squash blossoms are beautiful and delicious.\u00a0 Mexico has long known the joys of these beauties and has created many dishes from them, including a soup that is fantastic and a great use for that \u201cWhat do I do with all of these zucchini\u201d feeling (Recipe to come at another time).\u00a0 But for me, the highest achievement of the blossom is an amazing little pocket of deep fried cheesy goodness found in this recipe.<\/p>\n
For stuffing, pick out blossoms that are big and open or that open easily when gently prodded.\u00a0 I like to pick ones with a couple of inches of stem on them.\u00a0 This not only provides a nice handle for eating after frying, but allows you to place the blossoms in a shallow dish of water to keep them fresh and open just like you would do for any cut flower.\u00a0\u00a0 Snip off a small part of the stem before placing them in the water.\u00a0 The sap closes the cut stem up and this step helps keep them fresh until you are ready to use them.\u00a0 Regardless, blossoms should be used on the same day you buy them or they will not open up nicely for stuffing.\u00a0 If this happens, chop them up and use them for a frittata or soup.<\/p>\n
- Stuffed Squash Blossoms with Three Cheeses<\/dd>\n<\/dl>\n<\/div>\n